(Ding donggoes that good ole doorbell.)
Young adult woman 1: (Opens the door.) Hey, can I help you?
Boy 1: Uuuuuh I hope so Ma'am. We were using our drone to follow a family of turtles and we thought it might've crashed in your backyard.
YAW 1: Oh yeah yeah it's here. Come on in. (They enter. She locks the door.) So you guys like turtles?
Boy 1: Yeah.
YAW 1: That's awesome.
(They walk into the kitchen.)
YAW 2: Time's up MFs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Boy 2: Shit, it's a trap!
YAW 1: You think I give a f ##k about turtles?!
Boy 3: We're sorry! We just wanted to learn how to kiss!
Boy 1: Lucas! It's none of their business!
Boy 3: We should've just told the truth. We're going to a kissing party and none of us have ever kissed and we're scared!
Boy 2: Hotdammit, Lucas! I've had SEX before, but I've never KISSED a girl.
YAW 1: Just go online and type in how to kiss. That's what everyone does.
Boys: Oooooooooh!
YAW 2: It's VERY easy.
Boy 1: Look, can I please have the drone back? It's a BD Rolling Thunder. It's my Dad's. He needs it for work. Can I please have it back? I really need it. Please?
YAW 2: I don't think so.
Boy 1: If you don't give it back, I'll tell my Dad you stole it.
YAW 1: Then I'll tell him you're a pervert. We'll tell the whole school.
Boy 2: This is central harassment!
YAW 2: We'll tell everyone that you're a misogynist.
Boy 1: I've never massaged anyone.
YAW 2: (Whispers in his ear.) This is wat happens when you don't respect women.
Sign. That took me right out of the movie. They just had to shoehorn in another PC lesson because... men are inherently bad. It's so 2019 and I'm sick of it.
So thank you, Ghostbusters 2016. Thank you The Last Jedi. Thank you Captain Marvel. Thank you, Shazam. Thank you, Gilette. Thank you, Spider-Man Far From Home ("and therefore I have value?"). Thank you, Batwoman ("I'm not about to let a man take credit for a woman's work"). And thank you, The Good Boys. We have learned our lesson.
Enough said.
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